On this day...

On this day, two years ago, something wonderful happened: 

I got the puppy of my dreams.

The perfect German Shepherd.

"He is so beautiful and so well mannered. He is not very noisy, but he does have an opinion. He is VERY, VERY smart.
He likes to sleep around my feet. I am not sure how that is going to work when he gets to be 90 pounds, but we will figure out something. Right now my feet are cold, and he is warm, so it works out pretty good for us both!
I was not sure how my dad would like him at first, but when he met my dad, he just laid his head in my dad's hand and stayed there. Needless to say, that tickled my dad pretty good. I think he likes Tyrone (SCORE!).
My 4 year old sister LOVES Tryone to a fault. She spends so much time petting and talking to him that she forgets to do her chores!" - August 5th, 2011

He was beautiful and so much fun...

Then, 6 months to the day that I got him, I had to let him go:

"For reasons and circumstances out of my control, I had to take Tyrone to the Tulsa German Shepherd Dog Rescue in Tulsa, OK (of February 3rd, 2012).
This has made me very sad. He was my best friend. Because he was my best friend, I did what I think was best for him considering the decisions I was faced with concerning his future." - February 4, 2012 

 Three days later, I got wonderful news that helped ease the pain of my broken heart:

""Great News! Tyrone has been adopted! We didn't even have him on the website as available yet."A guy came out to see another dog, but Tyrone ran straight to the guy and just started licking his face off just like they were old friends. It was mutual love at first site." 

This is simply amazing news, because anyone who has met Tyrone before knows that he is frightened of new people and is absolutely TERRIFIED of men. I was shocked by the news! 

"The guy is retired and just lost his wife. He wanted a dog to be his constant companion by his side day and night all day everyday. He said the only time they would be apart is when he has to go grocery shopping and stuff like that."He has also had German Shepherds his whole life, so he is very familiar with the breed."

This sounds like the perfect situation for Tyrone. It is just the thing he needs.

"I do think it is perfect for both. It really seemed like two old friends who were being reunited. It never ceases to amaze me how these things just work out sometimes."Again, you did a wonderful job with him (Tyrone) and he is such a good boy. I know how difficult it must have been for you to give him up, but knowing he will have a long, healthy, happy life with someone who loves him (and I think needed him) helps."

It really does help. Knowing that my 'baby' is with someone who can give all their attention to him and who understands the German Shepherd breed is very comforting. I honestly do not feel mad and upset about Tyrone going to the rescue now. I am happy that God really worked it out for this man and Tyrone to be together, and I am proud that I was a first stepping stone in Tyrone's life. It was not how I planned it to work out, but my plan was selfish. I had planned Tyrone to be all mine forever. Now I see how great God's plan is. I was only preparing Tyrone to go to someone else who really needed him. Sure the parting hurt and my heart is broken, but it is bitter sweet now, knowing the ending." - February 5th, 2012

I have struggled for the past two years with bitterness and resentment, depression and feelings of failure over giving up my baby. If I would have had a choice, I would have kept him. I have asked God why many times: "Why did someone else get to have him? I paid for him! I trained him! I loved him! He was mine! Why couldn't I keep him!?"

But, over time, I have come to just rest in the knowledge that God had a better plan. I don't know exactly what His plan was, but I do know that I was not meant to keep Tyrone.

I miss him bitterly. I want him back. But I know that he and I can be in no better place other than God's will.